Antenna Helena

Yahoo Buys Tumblr (by SourceFed)

Tue, 21 May 2013 09:47:05 +0200

Yahoo Buys Tumblr (by SourceFed)

I said I would and I will... partially.

Mon, 20 May 2013 22:40:59 +0200

So I have opened a Blogger account as of today.

I am NOT planning on leaving Tumblr behind by any means. Love it too much to leave it behind.

But if Yahoo is gonna do their lucrative thing in here, I figured I might try to do mine someplace else too.

Still working in my Wordpress ‘thingy’ because I’d like it to be absolutely sleek.

Blogger is the ‘happy medium’.

Click here to see my insight regarding this new phase.

Feel free to subscribe and support!

Fear not to the AdSense because I am not qualified yet. But your support and insight would mean a lot to me.

Thank you!

I beg to differ

Sun, 19 May 2013 22:00:00 +0200

Has Tumblr been sold to Yahoo?

http://allthingsd.com/20130519/yahoo-tumblrs-for-cool-board-approves-1-1-billion-deal/

Why, David Karp, why?!

Beware Marissa Mayer. Tumblr is not LaLaLand. Tumblr is a religion.

Humiliation!

…and this is how they threw us all into a pool of sharks…

Don’t make me exile to Wordpress, Tumblr.

I’ve got a (positive) whiteboard.

Sat, 18 May 2013 12:35:10 +0200

I’ve got a (positive) whiteboard.

Where’s Waldo?

Fri, 17 May 2013 11:22:58 +0200

Where’s Waldo?

"“Be like water making its way through cracks. Do not be assertive, but adjust to the object, and you..."

Thu, 16 May 2013 19:31:59 +0200

“

“Be like water making its way through cracks. Do not be assertive, but adjust to the object, and you shall find a way around or through it. If nothing within you stays rigid, outward things will disclose themselves.

Empty your mind, be formless. Shapeless, like water. If you put water into a cup, it becomes the cup. You put water into a bottle and it becomes the bottle. You put it in a teapot, it becomes the teapot. Now, water can flow or it can crash. Be water, my friend.”

”

- Bruce Lee

Put a disco ball on the ceiling, get some ambient lights, hand...

Wed, 15 May 2013 19:38:00 +0200

Put a disco ball on the ceiling, get some ambient lights, hand me a glass of Chardonnay and let’s dance to this song really close.

Renee Geyer - It only happens (when I look at you).

Still here!

Tue, 14 May 2013 19:07:00 +0200

Just a quick but not less important note, people!

I want to thank you from the very bottom of my heart for all of your kind words of support.

I’ve decided that I don’t want to go ‘all dark’ (so to speak) and sometimes some things must remain unwritten to the public eye. Thus, I will go no further deeper on the matter that led me to write the previous post.

It needed to be written because it needed to be seen. And I cling to the hope that it has been read.

Anyway, as long as I want to keep some things private like all of us do (you don’t go screaming to the winds you got hemorrhoids, right?) I will move on to other subjects if that is O.K. with you guys.

I really hope it is.

Thank you so much!

Sometimes, a cry for desperate help cannot be made publicly. Sometimes, some stuff is way too...

Fri, 10 May 2013 20:01:35 +0200

Sometimes, a cry for desperate help cannot be made publicly.

Sometimes, some stuff is way too personal to be spoken out loud.

But that doesn’t make is less important.

Unraveling me

Fri, 10 May 2013 11:30:00 +0200

What you’re about to read is an excerpt from an email that I just wrote to a good friend a couple of days ago. Now, for some personal reasons I cut off some parts of the writing. Mainly because there are highly personal and I just talk about the person I am entitled to; that being myself.

Given his profession, he needs no less than to be treated with the utmost discretion. And NO, you probably don’t know him.

But I realized what I wrote became cathartic at some point and it made a lot of sense. In here, I am talking about my principles and beliefs. So I thought I’d share a bit of what I wrote to him with you guys just so you can see were I’m coming from and hopefully, it helps make sense some of my points of view, reactions, opinions.

Again: This is nothing but my life experience. No sugar coating, no exaggeration.

Hope you enjoy it.

So girls with glasses, huh? That’s because you need them too and I bet unconsciously understand the inconvenience of needing a pair of spectacles by your bed just to not stumble your way up to the WC every morning, lol! See? I see it as empathy. I don’t mind men with glasses because I can look them straight in the eye and say: I feel you. Besides, how come, us people with prescription glasses tend to have more beautiful eyes than people who have good eyesight? Is it the shape? Hmm… Anyway, I wear them because I don’t want to go blind and stuff. But I secretly hate them. Not on other people’s faces but on my own. I feel they are like some sort of invisibility cloak. And when I want to be invisible I put them on. Also, I wear them a lot because I have issues reading with contacts. But believe you me: my confidence boosts whenever I am without them. I feel like they can see the real me, without interferences. I have some good blog entries talking about it and people tend to agree.

Relationships:

I am sorry that you’ve gone through that. In that, I totally understand what you’re saying and it gives me the creeps whenever I see people who value other’s not for WHO they are but for WHAT they have.

See? There, my folks did a good job at parenting. To me, it deserves the same respect my old gossipy neighbor than the Queen of England and that is to treat others with nothing but the utmost respect. For some life circumstances I have lived almost on both sides of the spectrum myself. And I never lost integrity and would never sell my soul for a cent, nor would allow anyone approach to me for what I have/possess. I am not the stuff I can afford, I am my own being. And I never envied anyone for what they have or not have. Interestingly enough, a wealthy guy (I met long ago at the Campus), son of the retired ambassador of Colombia in Japan told me something that really made me open my eyes: I was being constantly harassed by a roommate because I had a car and she did not, so she made me feel guilty up until the point I felt guilty for owning a brand new car. Then this guy told me: ‘Look Elena, DO NOT feel sorry for what you have, many people would love to be in your position. And no, they will never understand what’s going on behind closed doors’. So NO, I am not a showoff but I no longer feel guilty for loving technology and allowing myself having some cool gadgets every now and then. And it is nobody’s business but mine.

Downside was, that all of this was because this dude was interested in me, and I am sorry, but I could feel less attracted to him. He offered me a life of wealth. I saw that as being a prostitute, I’m sorry. I think too highly of my integrity to sell it for less than love (mutual that is). And currently I have not very much cash (so to say) but I do not feel poor at all for there is no one poorer than the person who lacks of good manners.

When it comes to men, it is going to take a miracle to trust a man ever again. I have been hurt in so many different ways that I unconsciously react the same way a fish does when you catch it with your bare hands. I get extremely slippery. And I already tried to create a Match dot com profile or whatever. It just didn’t work for me. First, after all I’ve been through with guys, don’t expect me to go and trust a stranger from a profile on the internet. Secondly: First thing they see is my face and then they want to ‘get some’. And my ‘get some’ days are far behind me. Same thing you say with money, I don’t want to get approached for looks or whatever. I want someone to see the real me and value that, not the façade. To add the cherry on top, men tend to unconsciously look for a submissive partner and this is not within my nature. Perhaps because I have been surrounded by lots of male friends while growing up, I demand no less than equality. Of course men are stronger and women are better are listening. But on a daily basis I am not looking for my other half. I want my +1. Someone who will support me and my flaws and also I can count on. And then, vice versa.

This is why I am still single. Better safe than sorry. If I was a mere B.I.T.C.H. I would use some guys for the S.E.X. and then dump them. But that is not me: I do not want to be remembered as in: ‘How many couples did grandma have? 123.456???? That, to me, is lack of commitment, seriousness and ultimately self-respect.

…and I do not look down on people who do it the other way around. It is just withing my nature to be this way and I obviously respect other points of view.

FUNDACIÓN ANAR. “ONLY FOR CHILDREN” (by GREY SPAIN)...

Tue, 07 May 2013 11:54:10 +0200

FUNDACIÓN ANAR. “ONLY FOR CHILDREN” (by GREY SPAIN) How to help abused children seek for help.

Hurting so bad

Sun, 05 May 2013 00:11:00 +0200

Once again, my heart and soul have been broken, torn, shattered and scattered all over the place.

When will I ever learn I am not worthy of love?

I confused pity with affection.

Me on 3D life earlier today.

Thu, 02 May 2013 23:41:39 +0200

… it’s when you want to say something with nothing but good intentions but the second you mumble it, your mouth becomes same size as Totoro’s one whenever he is not yawning. Written word was created to not have the need to read between the lines anymore.

jhnmyr: New record this Summer… Not a Born and Raised “plus”… A new group of songs to bring the...

Thu, 02 May 2013 23:14:27 +0200

jhnmyr:

New record this Summer… Not a Born and Raised “plus”… A new group of songs to bring the whole thing up to date with Summer 2013. I have that hunger that always precedes something meaningful. See you all soon. And thanks for the warm welcome back to the stage. Getting back on it a little at a time.

John

And we will be waiting for that precursor that surely will trigger something SO beautiful.

Makeup

Thu, 02 May 2013 19:27:40 +0200

Judging by the title one might get to the conclusion that we are talking about superficiality and vanity here.

Truth be told, I am going to go any possible way but superficial. And I will only talk about my experience which is the only one I can truly swear by.

Earlier on today, while I was getting ready to jump into the shower I started removing the makeup I had so diligently applied on my face earlier this morning. It revealed a really pale skin and some deep dark circles. I no longer looked cheerful or healthy for that matter. Truth be told, these past weeks I have been going through an ordeal and my body is a winner for just being here still.

Now, I love makeup, the gorgeous colors, fashion, having the ultimate lipstick on the market and all that fun stuff. Nobody taught me that, I guess it was innate in me. I still remember how when I was 13 I went and secretly bought my first lipstick (it was pink, of course). I would apply it while I was at the bathroom, take a brush, turn on the radio and pretend I was a diva. When I’d finish the performance (for my only amusement) in front of the mirror I would turn off the music, remove the lipstick, flush the toilet to justify my long stay in there and leave to being ‘normal’.

I must recognize that I never suffered from acne so my face was pretty flawless. So when I was in high school, unlike some friends who used it to cover the acne, I just didn’t need to. Instead, I would use it on Friday nights when we went to the disco just to impress guys. I emulated a huuuuge lot the look of Julia Roberts by that time. So as you can see, I didn’t go all ‘painted’ like a Picasso work of art.

When I got to the university, I would just not wear any kind of makeup except black liner pretty much like every other female living and breathing. Somehow, either way, I had managed to collect a significant amount of foundations, blushes, mascaras, lipsticks… you name it. Friends and family would come to me to get them all beautiful for weddings and celebrations. I had read so many Cosmopolitans and spent so many hours getting ready to act in front of the mirror I had gotten pretty good at it.

Up until lately. On some days when I am just plain bored I will create really beautiful dramatic looks from other eras and act and pretend. But that stays in my bedroom.

For the most part, I will just wake up, brush my teeth, wash my face, brush my hair and this is how you’ll find me 300 days (give or take) of the year. Au naturel. I am quite content with the looks I was given, not the health though. See? Nobody’s perfect.

Anyways:

Some days I will feel so bubbly and cheerful that I will drop my glasses, put my contacts (even though it is hard for me to read with contacts) and apply a beautiful makeup and feel oh…! So great.

But then there are two other kinds of days left to describe.

There are some days that my body will be in pain and me, refusing to look bad, I will apply some makeup on my face: Just the right amount that you couldn’t tell. You just see me and I just look healthy.

Then there are the dreadful days. I wake up feeling so bad that I don’t even want to pretend I’m good. I want the world (my family and friends) to see my body is in pain and the usage of no makeup will speak for me and I will not need to justify my inactivity or seriousness or tears.

So as you can see, a thing that at the beginning might look so flat is so multidimensional, at least for me.

It can be a fun entertaining art, it can be some cream to boost your self esteem, and it can help you express so many things without saying a word.

Even the presence or absence of it will speak volumes.

PS: I you see me glowing and you scratch my face and nothing comes off, you are witnessing a blissful good day, when life cannot be any better. And if to that you add some really rosy cheeks, you might be witnessing a woman in love.

A week later

Wed, 01 May 2013 12:55:00 +0200

Exactly a week and a day ago, on St. Jordi, a day about lovers and roses, my ex, (the reason why I started blogging here) popped out of nowhere on my FB account.

I was having lunch with my family and only found out about it later when I came back home and saw the mail. What can I say? I was hallucinating. Out of all the people in this planet, the last person I was expecting to hear from it was him. To be honest, I hadn’t been thinking about him (at all) in a really long time.

So I decided to be polite and say hello. He was online and immediately answered and we chatted for a while. He was asking me how was I doing, how were things, how many good wishes he had for me… blah, blah, blah… Bottom line, he had split up with the girl he left me for.

Allegedly, he left me because according to his words ‘I was too good for him and I deserved someone better’. Bullshit. That is a lame way to say I found someone else. So when we broke up, after some time crying on the phone he swore that I would find a good guy much sooner than he would find the right girl for him. A week after breaking up, he had a picture of himself kissing an Erasmus girl on his FB profile. And the thing evolved to ‘being in a relationship with’ (which apparently must have been to embarrassing to recognize he was with me; I could care less now). Later on, they were engaged or so it said there.

Photos of both of them, picture frame perfect in New Caledonia and what not while I was scuba diving in my misery. Up until the point, after some long years, I didn’t care about him or his life any longer.

He had cut any kind of contact with me, and I stopped any sort of research about his life.

So it goes to show that, when last Tuesday he appeared out of nowhere in my inbox, I was no less than perplex.

I went neither amiable, nor rude with him. I just limited myself to answer his questions. Yes, I am still single, this and that. So when he told me he was no longer with that “dudette” I just did not respond.

I guess he was expecting for me to run back to his arms. Little did he know that I had moved on FOR GOOD.

Instead, I just limited myself to ask him: ‘So how’s life treating you anyway? Are you achieving your goals and dreams?’.

Silence was the answer.

At least he had the courtesy of not going any lower to get back at me. I’d rather stay single the rest of my life than getting back to that old relationship that as I will attach next, Beyoncé couldn’t have said it better.

‘Thank God you blew it. Thank God I dodged that bullet. I’m so glad I found the good in goodbye’.

He insisted further on the week: ‘So are you seeing anyone?’

I just posted the following video on my FB timeline.

I bet he got the message.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FHp2KgyQUFk

Proud Mary

Sat, 27 Apr 2013 20:50:00 +0200

I never payed much attention to its lyrics.Then this morning, I listened closely and now… Now it looks like I can’t get enough of singing Tina Turner’s version of this song.

First nice and easy.

And then… rough!

I painted a huge hibiscus on the bedroom wall long time ago....

Fri, 26 Apr 2013 10:46:00 +0200

I painted a huge hibiscus on the bedroom wall long time ago. Today I’m having my bedroom repainted. Giving it a more mature look. Things evolve.

Just A Girl

Thu, 25 Apr 2013 11:17:00 +0200

Take this pink ribbon off my eyes
I’m exposed
And it’s no big surprise
Don’t you think I know
Exactly where I stand
This world is forcing me
To hold your hand
‘Cause I’m just a girl, little ‘ol me
Don’t let me out of your sight
I’m just a girl, all pretty and petite
So don’t let me have any rights

Oh…I’ve had it up to here!
The moment that I step outside
So many reasons
For me to run and hide
I can’t do the little things I hold so dear
‘Cause it’s all those little things
That I fear

‘Cause I’m just a girl I’d rather not be
‘Cause they won’t let me drive
Late at night I’m just a girl,
Guess I’m some kind of freak
‘Cause they all sit and stare
With their eyes

I’m just a girl,
Take a good look at me
Just your typical prototype

Oh…I’ve had it up to here!
Oh…am I making myself clear?
I’m just a girl
I’m just a girl in the world…
That’s all that you’ll let me be!
I’m just a girl, living in captivity
Your rule of thumb
Makes me worry some

I’m just a girl, what’s my destiny?
What I’ve succumbed to is making me numb
I’m just a girl, my apologies
What I’ve become is so burdensome
I’m just a girl, lucky me
Twiddle-dum there’s no comparison

Oh…I’ve had it up to!
Oh…I’ve had it up to!!
Oh…I’ve had it up to here!

The Matrix

Thu, 25 Apr 2013 10:21:00 +0200

Are we living inside The Truman Show?

…or should I say…

We are living inside The Truman Show.

Granted George Orwell’s 1984 is no longer just fiction.